Happy Anniversary!(to me)


September 28, 2007

Today was my anniversary. I got through it. I went for a run, then I went to a spa. The body wrap was OK. My skin is still dry. She did not put any moisturizer on. Actually, when I started talking to her I recognized her from The Inn On The Twenty. She did a sinus treatment for me. She was really nice.

I get so angry sometimes. I wonder if he thought about me today. Probably not. Oh well, to a better life! I need a better life!

Emotional Health

  • Do not want to kill myself
  • I used to wake up every morning and say “Oh God, another day”
  • I would pretend I was sleeping so I would not have to talk to him
  • I could not handle him anymore
  • I did not love him anymore. I fell out of love before the wedding. I remember the picnics. I merely wanted to buy a sub and lay by the water. Instead we had to go to the grocery store, buy meat and buns. the cheapest we could get. Go back to his parents make the buns and then go.. 3 hours later. All I wanted was a sub!
  • Then he would “guide” me regarding my finances or career. It was not a pleasurable experience. In fact I found it very painful. he was always obsessed about money.
  • I remember driving down the Parkway and thinking that I am making a big mistake, but I could not get out of it because my parents would kill me.
  • We never even talked about our wedding day
  • He would not buy a wedding picture from the photographer
  • I never knew what he was thinking because he was so secretive
  • I hated him after the honeymoon, hated his company, never thought he was attractive. He was arrogant, annoying, immature and stupid.
  • He treated me like shit!
  • It was an awful marriage, or whatever it was!



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