Self Righteous?

July 02, 2008

My ex-husband smokes pot and drinks a lot, and I am told, so does his girlfriend. He once told me that I am too righteous because I don’t drink or do drugs, and attend church. I struggled with this notion for a long time. I used to think something was wrong with me because I don’t like to party. That’s what he wanted me to believe. I am in my early thirties and I used to party when I was younger but I think it is very superficial and would rather be doing something else. I am very different than he is. In fact, I once thought that we liked the same things and had a lot in common. I was very wrong. I do not know who he is. It is funny that you can be with someone for several years and not even know them.

I guess I am a simple person, I like running, biking, community events and going to church. I also like to be around people, who are like me. In fact, I did not realize this before, but none of my friends smoke, drink, or use drugs. Is there something wrong with all of us? I think, when you are with someone for so long, that is all you know and believe that is how you are supposed to be.


One Response to “Self Righteous?”

  1. Airell Says:

    There is nothing wrong with you. you are simple, down-to-earth person. And I think it’s great. To be self-righteous means to preach what one does not practice. It also means the person lacks understanding. For instance, if there is a rule that one can dress casually on a day-to-day basis but during interviews one must dress even more so appropriately. It simply means you don’t dress like a bum but you don’t dress like Cinderella at the ball. But you present yourself the best you can and take pride in your appearance. An ex-friend of mine was sooooo self-righteous that she judged and criticized me for looking my best and said I was trying to change myself!
    That is what being self-righteous is…it’s people who like to boast about knowing the rules of life and yet don’t follow it themselves as well as the fact they these people lack understanding. In some circumstances, you can break rules. You judge on a person-to-person basis and circumstance-to-circumstance basis. This girl, no longer my friend, thought she knew so much about the world that she inadvertently presented herself as bigoted. Because you enjoy a simple life, doesn’t mean you’re righteous. By definition, this is what the word means: morally right. It has nothing to do with HOW you live. A man as abusive as your ex-husband, once did the same thing to me. I don’t care for parties. I like a few good friends to stand by me and NOT use me…and enjoy doing the hobbies I love…that’s it.

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