Do You Recover?

October 9, 2007

Do you ever fully recover from this? And can you?

He never talked to me, only about finances, sex and in analogies. Why didn’t he talk to me? I will never fully understand. I asked him about his game, nothing. I asked him about work, nothing. I asked him about the way he was feeling, nothing. I asked about his friends, nothing, or I don’t know. All he ever wanted to talk about was money. It was like he felt uncomfortable talking to me. But he was able to talk to his friends. When he got his cell phone, he said to me that no one calls the house because I had asked why no-one calls. Implying that it was my fault that no one calls. It was always my fault. I remember that he was in the computer room all the time. When I walked in he would always close the window so I wouldn’t see what he was doing. This happened all the time. He was so secretive. He does not even know me. He never took the opportunity to know me. He was trying to mold me into something that I am not.

My parents and everyone else have seen validation of what type of person he is, but no one is more affected than me. No one knows what it is like because I was married to him. I am the one who slept with him, trusted him, took care of the house and washed his clothes.

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